You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I think I sprained my soul last night
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Randomize
