My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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