Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
