it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
