belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
