Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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