he puts the penis in happiness.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
