I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It's shark week go big or go home
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Randomize
