Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
