I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
