So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
