i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
