I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize