For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
