just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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