I looked at my own cervix.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
