When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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