It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
