Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
