Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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