Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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