its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize