you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
