Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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