do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
This baby is an asshole
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize