It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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