I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
