Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
God, I missed his penis.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
