Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
