I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
It's just like the Real World with babies
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
