K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
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