thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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