But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I don't deserve a penis
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'm sobbing to NWA
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
