garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
