Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
