This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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