hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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