Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Randomize
