My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Randomize
