More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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