I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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