he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm gonna fight the coyote
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
