you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
