just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
The feeling are messing with the penis
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
