I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
