all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize
