I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
