Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
