i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
it glows. i had to have it.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
