I feel great
I just peed on a car
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
How does one acquire holy water?
Randomize
